Cheers is a perfect show

 Have you ever watched Cheers?

If you haven't...WATCH IT.

That's all for this blog post.

And, to all of you who have been paying attention to my life, I'm not sharing this blog post with any other "social media" outlet.

Sincerely,

Doug

A Plea For Help

 I got bit by a tick between 2014 and 2015. I got weaker and weaker, my former primary care physician ignoring my pains and pleas for help, until finally I was diagnosed with Lyme Disease. The tick bite included a dispersal and replication of that tick, and I'm weak at the age of 41. I still have many goals in life, to get my pilot's license and work my way up to commercial airline pilot. I've got shows and movies I want to make, I want to get married and have kids with a sexy wife, I want to do stand-up comedy again, I want to host a late night talk show, I want to make more music, I want to make more podcasts, I want to make video games, I want to make more of my Face It Font, I want to skate vert and go to skate parks and learn more tricks...

So much of what I've mentioned I want to do hinges on getting cured of Lyme Disease.

There IS a cure, but it's expensive. If I can raise $10000 plus food and lodging expenses, I'll be able to do so much more in this awesome life.

Please donate with a note on how much you hate Lyme Disease or how much you love being healthy:

Venmo:

www.venmo.com/doug-culp

PayPal:

www.paypal.me/dougathan

Zelle:

Today I Went To A Liquor Store And Bought A 24 Ounce Can Of Booze

 Today is "National Hamburger Day" and I went to a liquor store and bought a 24 oz can of booze to get a little tipsy. I then went to a different liquor store and bought 3 50 mL bottles of liquor for $5.19 (after the credit card processing fee).

I don't feel any different than I felt before buying what I bought. I feel a little tipsy, which is good. I feel like I've been robbed on the price front. "Supreme Liquor", if you see this post somehow...LOWER YOUR PRICES!!! WHY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN STADIUM IF YOUR PRICES ARE SO HIGH?!?!

I just finished watching S01E10 of Rutherford Falls and all I can say about that show is: HEY PEOPLE PRETENDING TO BE "NATIVES": STOP! STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING!!!

That's it. If you are someone who volunteered to have his or her body "transformed" into a "non-white" person...you should be murdered. You are what's wrong with the world today. You are the reason there is hatred and "biggotry" and you should literally throw yourselves into a live volcano to end your meaningless lives.

If you've already done that, and you were miraculously saved somehow...you should be shot or thrown into one of those machines that can shred a couch.

I tried to watch an episode of The Simpsons, earlier, but was rudely interrupted by either my phone "not recognizing" the wi-fi signal, or the wi-fi signal "not recognizing" my phone.

Either way...YOU ARE ALL going to be blamed for this. I'm just a straight white guy trying to find work in this "ever-evolving" industry.

On my walks to and from a liquor store, I've seen writing on the ground. One quote says, "COME HOME" and it's underlined twice. There are several places I've lived that I would consider "HOME", so to the "taggers" I have to say, "Be more specific.". Which home are you talking about? Why did you take so much time to express what you wanted to say, but didn't take the time to be as specific as to say "Which home" you were talking about?

To those of you who are somehow "with me" while I'm typing this...WHY HAVEN'T YOU HELPED ME?! WHY ARE YOU SITTING ON YOUR BUTTS, WAITING FOR ME TO TALK TO YOU?! And, to the stupid shirtless faggot who called me a "pussy" earlier...WHAT WAS YOUR GOAL? WHY DID YOU CALL ME THAT, AND WHY DID YOU CALL ME THAT?! WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH?! If you were trying to get me to approach you to ask you why you weren't wearing a shirt...WHY WERE YOU TRYIJNG TO GET ME TO ASK YOU THAT?! WHY WEREN'T YOU WEARING A SHIRT?! WHAT WAS YOUR ULTIMATE GOAL?!

I think there might be A LOT of people whom I've met (and some whom I haven't met) trying to get me to to approach them and converse with them...with one reason to waste my time, and with the other reason being a mystery.

IAN KARMEL...YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I HEARD YOUR VOICE WHEN I DID WHAT I'M REFERRING TO IN THE NEXT SENTENCE!

If you can prove that you have video of the day that I was coerced into trying to jump over that fire, PLEASE EMAIL ME: moqboy@gmail.com AS SOON AS YOU READ THIS!

Some Thoughts About Sexual Attraction

 I've had a lot of loves in my life. From Jenee Smith to Julianna Kufeldt. I'd like to be with someone who, when we're together, we don't think about anything else.

There's an episode of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, where Buffy and Angel start having sex, over and over again. In this particular episode, the camera pulls back to reveal that the two of them are thinking of nothing else except for having sex again and again and again.

I want something like that.

I've met and made out with more than a few girls with whom I've felt that...more than a few have just been make-out sessions.

I once made a list of girls I've kissed...that wasn't enough. Some girls that I've kissed I've felt ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. More times than with those I've felt nothing, I've felt the way Angel and Buffy felt...where we could be kissing and having sex with no end in sight. I want that again.

Jacking off is jacking off. I don't feel like I've felt a connection with the girls in the videos I've jacked off to.

Shay...if you see this post somehow...I felt good when we were together. I think the song that I only finished after we were together, was influenced by outside sources. Were you wearing "Molly" on your lips the first time we kissed? That was also the first time we met. Then somehow, "magically" I was able to finish writing a song that I'd only written halfway. DUMB. FUCK OFF. You and your "cohorts" need to crawl back into whichever hovel you crawled out of, and let me go. Let me leave your weird "NON-BINARY COLLECTIVE" and NEVER CONTACT ME AGAIN.

To those of you girls who I've had a sexual connection with (you know who you are), PLEASE contact me.

In episode 498 of my podcast "You And Me And Thoughts And Talk with Doug Culp", I titled the episode: CONTACT ME. Hopefully there are those of you who have listened, and are currently listening, who will find ways to contact me (without relying on whatever the fuck Aldrin and I posited in the beginning phases of that pilot episode of a TV show which will never air called "Deus").

Some other homeless guy said something in my direction, while I was walking, and I completely ignored it. Not only do I not remember anything he tried to say to me, but I'm currently feeling good and buzzed, sitting in my private room in this homeless shelter, waiting to hear back about the apartment I've been guaranteed because I've been patient and nice.

The last time I talked to someone who said he was the super at the apartment building I've been approved to move into, he said "2 or 3 months" (till it'll be ready). That was 1 month ago in April. That means that in June or July, I'll be getting to move into an apartment complex (thanks to a company that I got in touch with).

A special thanks to those who are putting the work in to help those in need, who've been looking for work, working, and also communicating their wants and needs.

I started a trial to Peacock, because my bank offered a 100% refund on my first month's subscription, and I started watching a show last night called Wolf Like Me. It's as I'd hoped, and I'm satisfied with the premise of this show. If you haven't seen it, I recommend it. If you have seen it, then you already know it's a good show. There's an unspoken sexual attraction referenced in this show, that can only be described if you've also felt it...cause, honestly, I NEVER would have put Josh Gad into a script as a sexual interest. There are some story elements of this show that I think can only be described as "animalistic", and I think whoever wrote this show had a fat guy in mind for the sexual interest of the sexy female Isla Fisher.

If you've ever READ a book called Ready Player One, you know that there's a kinda fat guy who's attracted to a kinda fat girl...Stephen Spielberg had a hand in writing a screenplay for Ready Player One as a movie, and both main characters ("Z" and "Art3mis") are thin.

Currently, I'm at the status where Simon Pegg's character from "Run Fatboy Run" was (not fat, just unfit).

I've been working out every day (minus one or two days a week) and have still been having trouble losing as much weight as I'd like.

"Don't even worry about it", I hear. I'm worried about it, because if I don't worry about it then the world will revert to a WEIRD WALL-E version of people where everyone is in automated chairs getting food fed to them and FAT FAT FAT PIECES OF SHIT ARE DICTATING HOW THE WORLD SHOULD BE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?

WALL-E is a Disney (and also Pixar) movie, showing how AWFUL the world would be if everyone had everything hand-fed to them (literally and metaphorically).

I'm ready to be physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight. I'm straight, and I have been through my life. I'm mentally awake. I've been physically strong...MINUS the tick that bit me when I was visiting my family in the Seattle Washington area. That STUPID tick, that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, placed on my body has prevented me from being physically strong. I wish to witness the death of whoever thought it was prudent to place a tick on my body. Since that tick bite, I've witnessed my body get weaker and weaker and weaker, only to be SOMEHOW halfway "healed" from the effects of that tick bite, that STUPID, FUCKED UP DAY where I was on a long MESSED UP walk to sit cross-legged in front of BUTTON MASH (a now-defunct "barcade").

If you, or anyone you know, has details on WHAT HAPPENED TO ME THAT DAY, I implore you to contact me at one of my podcast emails here: yamatatpodcast@gmail.com

To those of you who consider this podcast that I've been posting around the globe as a podcast between me and Angela...ANGELA SAID SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DO A PODCAST. THEN I ASKED HER IF I COULD DO A PODCAST UNDER A NAME THAT WE "SEEMINGLY" THOUGHT OF AT THE EXACT SAME TIME. She agreed that I could do a podcast under the name: You And Me And Thoughts And Talk with Doug Culp.

If you have any questions or comments, please direct them to yamatatpodcast@gmail.com and you'll receive an answer...I keep in touch with my fans. Melissa Villasenor...if you see this somehow, I only remember good times with you. I hope and pray that you find it in your heart to unblock my new phone number (which I don't think I gave you in the past) so that we can continue our friendship.

To those of you who have connections with Stories (a bookstore in Echo Park) or Good Heroin Comedy (a stand-up comedy show in the back of Stories), I hope and pray that you see me as an entertainer. If you heard me say something negative, as an audience member (from the parking lot), I hope you can consider the possibility that you might be TOO SENSITIVE FOR COMEDY. WHY, and HOW, could I have been pushed away from a FREE COMEDY SHOW...? Did I get a little too drunk? Maybe. Could I have been given 1 or 2 warnings before getting "BANNED" from a comedy show? Yep.

The ball is in your court, Good Heroin Comedy. To Kath...I'm not sure how to spell your first name...I still think you're ugly, I still think you have no business in booking a comedy show....except for names you may have poached from my podcast. Other than that, Kath...ryn????? Campbell...I hope you find peace and tranquility in your life. I feel nothing when I see you. I feel nothing when I hear you. You're probably going to end up in hell.

Think of what Jesus Christ would do, if someone was a little too drunk one night at a comedy show.

If you think you are better than Jesus Christ, then you're going to hell...probably literally. I can't imagine what that would be like.

I Got Drunk A Few Nights Ago And Some Ugly Mean Lady Hit Me With An Ash Tray

I got drunk a few nights ago, and some ugly, mean bitch hit me with an ash tray.

Here's the sequence of events:

I got drunk. I re-entered the homeless shelter where I'm currently staying. I saw some signs that were posted all over this homeless shelter saying that pets will have to be leashed and muzzled soon.

I saw a cute little dog without a leash and said, "Pretty soon that dog's gonna have to be on a leash."

I think she took that personally (somehow) and she got mad. Then she picked up a nearby ash tray and hit me with it.

I didn't report it; I didn't remember it.

She got kicked out of this homeless shelter.

I sent some documentation to my case worker, earlier, because I've been approved to move into an apartment.

I won't jeopardize that.

If anyone who's reading this knows about my struggle, you are OBLIGATED to reply to this blog post.

I found out, TODAY, that an acting job which paid me some residuals is based in North Carolina and South Carolina.

To my knowledge, I've never been to North Carolina or South Carolina.

I will accept the residuals check I was offered, because I am all-but-broke.

I KNOW that there is AT LEAST one production company trying to "reproduce" The United States Of America as an "acting exercise".

I deserve to know WHO HAS BEEN DOING THIS.

Something tells me that this is an "initiation" to the entertainment industry.

I'm aware I've been being messed with.

It Was Supposed To Be A Test Of Empathy, But You've Shown That The Hawthorne Effect Is Stronger

 There have been SO MANY TIMES in my life when I feel like I've known that there's been more happening than what I've been told.

Scientists THRIVE on having a control group and a placebo group. I think I've been part of a "control group" my whole life.

There are SO MANY instances where I can pinpoint when/where things haven't made sense, but were explained to me as having made sense. I started writing a book; Maybe I should get back to that.

If YOU feel like YOU'D buy a BOOK that I WROTE, subscribe to my (first) podcast: You And Me And Thoughts And Talk with Doug Culp (available on ALL podcast platforms).

If YOU feel like you'd follow me to the ends of the earth, follow my social media platforms. If you're reading this, you already know where and how to find me. SHARE THIS POST!

Tick

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=0SO7wNgrHYw&si=47NqIWZlsyHzax8i